This Time of year I always get to thinking about slowing down and enjoying the season. This thought brings me to the topic of margin in our life.

Like never before people are ON THE GO! Families have never been busier! There seems to be this thought that you must be juggling so many things to be successful. In reality though, it’s just creating more stress and chaos within the home. We have to be careful and intentional not to let activity, appointments pile up and cause us stress.

To create margin in my life, I have to be intentional.

In order to create margin, I need to be aware of my need for it. For our family, we can tell at times we become very busy. It is something that happens very subtly. Our calendar fills up one day at a time and then we realize that our family is going here and there day after day without a break.

Wake Up Earlier

This sounds simple, but in practice, it isn’t always easy. This is especially true if you are not a morning person by nature. It is often tempting to see the clock, and just roll back over to get a few more minutes of sleep. Additionally, there are seasons in which this might not be possible.

Brian and I have seven kids and know that sometimes it’s truly difficult to wake up if you’ve been up much of the night with the baby. If at all it is great to strive to have time before the kids get up in the morning. Gather your hot drink and your Bible and give your first part of the day to him (I share more on morning time here). This is also a great time for Brian and I to talk together without interruption from our kiddos. We usually spend time discussing the daily plan and have a few minutes to share thoughts with each other.

Learning to Say “No”

Saying “no”, even to good things is important when trying to add margin to our lives. There are so many activities and places to go that come up all of the time. We engage in church activities, family events, sports, and many other things. I’ve had to step back from a few fun outings with friends or even a Bible study at times just to be able to have time with my family.

The point is that it is okay to say “no” sometimes. In fact it is necessary to keep from over-committing and creating too much running around and chaos. Our family feels much better when we are not taking on too many tasks! I feel it is better to not run yourself ragged because you have agreed to do too many things. Agreeing to many activities ROBS the peace that the Lord wants us to have.

Daily Routine

We’ve talked about this before.  I can’t emphasize enough how having a simple daily routine can help one feel less stress. Even just jotting a simple “TO DO” list can help you have a visual of some things you need to tackle, and be okay if not everything gets done.  Creating a simple routine for kids can help them feel less stressed as well. If our kids have a check off list for their chores and school things that need to get done, this allows them to feel more organized . Then, they will know what they are responsible for.

Social Media Controls

While Social Media can be a creative outlet and a neat place to get information (especially for specific places you follow), it can be a HUGE time waster. I notice that the constant scrolling on social media apps causes me to lose my joy. This also takes away from margin in my life. The more time I spend on social media, the less time I have to complete tasks and spend time doing better things throughout my day. Join with me and remember to take breaks from Social Media and limit your time on it.

Put your phone up and be present

It’s not always just the social media apps. Sometimes the good on our phones draw us in and we find ourselves losing a lot of time to them without realizing it. Phones can do so much that without realizing it, we are doing too much. I’ve even found myself grabbing my phone to look at it when I didn’t even have anything to do.

When we used to go to Disneyland regularly with our annual passes, Brian would always take notice of the many people, often in groups, looking down at their cell phones. He would always joke about people being at the happiest place on earth and still finding the cell phone more interesting. But then almost in the same breath, he would say that it caused him to realize just how much he was on his as well.

While that is somewhat humorous, we have both caught ourselves being on our phones when our kids are trying to talk with us. Sometimes we catch each other. Neither Brian nor myself want our kids’ childhood memories to be clouded with images of mom and dad on their cell phones “checking things”. So we have both realized that we need to put up our phones and be present with our kids.

Give yourself a challenge to get on your phone for certain things and certain times only! I think you’ll agree with us, that you will find yourself more productive, and that you will notice more margin in your daily schedule.

Creating Margin by Staying Home

Lastly, our family creates margin in our schedule by just being home. Being at home is important, especially with a growing family. We need to cherish this time with our kids and be present.

Years ago when our family was becoming increasingly busy, Brian instituted “Family Friday”. His goal was at a minimum to have Friday off limits to being outside of the home and busy. The idea was to say “no” to opportunities to go out on a Friday, and instead be at home. We would do various things such as playing a board game, or watching a movie. We would sometimes play legos, or just hang out together. But we both felt it was important to set aside time to be home with our family.

Final Thoughts

The Lord doesn’t want confusion, strife and stress.  Instead He wants peace, harmony, order and clarity.  1 Corinthians 14:33 “For God is not a God of confusion but of peace”.   When we don’t have margin in our life we tend to have confusion and stress.  Our families will be much more at PEACE once we add in margin.